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Posts Tagged ‘satire’

Just a few random observations for the readers gathered from the BFE slackers, hackers and the mail box.

We note that the McD’s of bigfootery is now offering a bounty of $100/second for good bigfoot footage, $200 if it is really sweet stuff.  And don’t try to send them junky film, by their own boast they are adept at sniffing out the fakes.  Like a sweet Vidalia onion there are many layers to this little tidbit.

  • Sell footage at one rate so it can be turned into a profit by reselling it as part of the titanicesque show in production.  It’s not about getting producer credit money or turning a buck by reselling footage, nope, its about the journey of discovery and ultimate proof.
  • It sounds like they have little meat and much filler so far and are worried the audience will lose interest in seeing the Frisch’s Big Boy do a rah-rah, waddle through the woods and hoot at the trees after one episode.  A dude walking around with a samurai sword and the other characters will only be novel once, precipitant loss of viewership is a worry at this point.
  • Paying for content is a novelty for an organization built upon the backs of the unpaid worker bees.
  • They know how to separate the fake from the real deal footage.  Does anyone remember Penn and Teller, Memorial Day footage and the pancake eater?  Yah, they are astute at spotting a hoax video.

Let the vulgar comments and litigious threats begin.

Something else one of the crack staff mentioned was that they notice Gullible was soliciting donations for the continued stellar reporting of bigfoot events.  We wondered if that with the Bos bos travel and expense account being pulled, going dutch is the rule, instead of greek, french or some other national variation.

And in a somewhat related development, we noticed the Bully is whining about slow donations for his anuual bigfootery money-maker.  His suggestion was to paypal him for admission even if you cannot attend.  Our suggestion to him is not to spend all five figures of the day’s take, like a squirrel put 10% of the nut away as that will cover all the expenses for next year’s event.  That’s right, we figure his gross margin is around 90% – and that is being conservative.  Imagine the income tax rate on a one day event that yields a five-figure payday for the sole proprietor, that income is being reported, right?

And in yet another related development, we have heard that TCS the youtube bigfooter is contemplating an invitation to speak in Ohio.  Negotiations are reportedly stalled as only a $20 gas card is being offered as the stipend to speak. If five people would go out,  buy a $10 gas card and send it to the Bully, then he will still be able to offer Tim $20 in gas and fill up his own tank.  And darn-it, “in a nutshell”, he deserves it for his “countless” efforts.  We might have this little bigfoot nugget all messed up, but from reports of other “stiffed” speakers, it is plausible.  But file this one as shameless and unconfirmed rumor.

And yet in  one more somewhat related development, connecting bigfootery’s dots, a blogger who named himself as the Bigfoot Research Buster and who took particular aim at TCS, the youtubin bigfooter, continues to hold a Board of Director seat with the anti-lock brake system group.  Shameful endorsement of bigfoot buffoonery in our eyes.  You won’t find that blog, the author closed up shop once the heat was on him.  It was a cheap and simpleton clone, you are not missing much.

Carry on, we are polishing up a field report and some other items for release.

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