Conflicted Over Conflict

A quandary exists.  There are  developments that should be noted, but noting them creates conflict.  Is it nobler to point out the absurdity or let bigfootery continue on its’ way, some wise, but many not so much?   We are conflicted over:

• posting a submitted comment about the sudden rise of event disorganizers using charitable donations as a feel good for their event.  The best part of the comment was where the person speculated that for one of the events the disorganizers could save a little  time (win) and simply not hold the event and donate what they lose in holding the event (charity wins with more money).  Win, win, makes some sense.
• noting that in the last episode of a certain show getting headliner billing at an event the camera dude and editor both missed a shot that showed a nest/hut that had at least two of the trees showing evidence of being worked with either a hatchet or axe.  Check the pawpaw shot.
• pointing out that the most legit “bigfoot researcher” on that bill has developed a “scheduling conflict”, perhaps indicating that some of the rumors of misgivings related to sharing the dias with Hollywood researchers might be true.
• or running the video below that certainly does not add to the credibility of the carpetbagger’s show.

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Killer Bees

Nope, not these Killer Bees.  We are talking Killer B’s as in Bigfooters.   And before the killer part is taken out of context in a spate of Facebook post indignities, we do not mean actual killers.

Earlier this week someone bumped the hive of the killer bees.  These particular bees are carpetbaggers who have set up shop north of the Ohio.  And like the real killer bees, not those dudes above but the actual buzzin bees, once the hive was bumped with some legitimate criticism (that could of been constructive if they could check the ego) they came a swarming out of the hive to attack the bumper into submission.  Froggy neck, froggy’s sockpuppet and the drama queen came out immediately to sting.  Their comments were hilarious, but evidently someone was not so proud after the swarming mission was complete and the interloper was vanquished and they have been relegated to the Facebook page admin delete file.   There is some irony in a guy who claims a love for constitutional rights to trample the first amendment, but consistency and actually walking the talk seldom happens in bigfootery.

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Bigfootery, How Deep is Your Bench?

With not one, nor two, but three, count-em three “conferences”,  in about a month time span in Ohio we will able to tell.  Actually, there are clues already.

My Bully is back and your goin  be in trouble, hey lahh, hey lahh, my bully is back – think The Angels in 1963.  After a three-year “trial”, he is re-entering  the conference space.  We have heard “trial” is a bit of a stretch and that his franchise payments were being drastically cut – thus the Bully is back.  How deep is his bigfootery bench?  Well, his line-up is essentially the same one he had the last time he sponsored a conference.  Weak bench.

And then one has the Hollywood carpetbaggers.   With one returning mockumentary star from last year and a recent addition of another, rumblings in the “community” are getting louder about the flagging  integrity of the event, and even the legit dudes that are sharing the stage with the made for TV “bigfoot researchers”.

And finally the Apple, Inc. of bigfootery conferences.  They are coming in with one returnee – one of the luminaries and some new blood.  But we suspect they are having a greater bench strength challenge given some much activity in one place in such a short time.

Will bench strength thin the herd?  Perhaps.  But given some of the egos involved, the potential profits, the potential for worship and conference groupies, we seriously doubt it.  One will simply see the current trend, a gradual decay in quality and relevance and more frankenbites.

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Huge, Breaking Announcement

With a nod to the relatively new bigfootery tactic of cyber pan handling, we announce our entry into a fund us now campaign.  Using a multi-faceted approach of spam emails for unclaimed funds left by relatives who were mining engineers in Gabon, a new line of hats, t-s and a snappy coffee mug and the cyber panhandling currently popular, it is our goal to raise $27,099.  This breaks out into $25k for attorney retainers, $1199 for a new Jackson Zen yak and about $900 for outfitting, especially a new Rivrstyx. What will those that participate in our bigfootery cyber begging campaign get?  We guarantee that with that money we will get a picture.  It will be clear and beyond dispute.  It will be a photo of team BFE, so we are confident it will happen. Thanks for reading, give early and give often.  Give until your wife or significant other notices the money is gone and threatens to dope slap you.

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The BFE Naughty and Nice List – Gifts Received Edit

Christmas has come and gone, let’s see the ideal gifts received by those on the naughty and nice list.

 

 

Nice

Bigfootery’s Courtney Love – as we said before,  unfiltered opinions voiced under the influence is sexy in a train wreck sort of way.

Gift Received – A hangover cure book – http://www.thriftbooks.com/w/50-ways-to-cure-a-hangover_cara-frost-sharratt/1187799/?isbn=1846014050&mkwid=LrWSUK76|dc&pcrid=63635728032&gclid=CIf3vtX-98ICFUtgMgodc3MAnw

The folks over at the Facebook coalition page, for culling the sewer that is Facebook bigfootery and providing us the best of the whackadoodles

Gift Received – Sasquatch Coffee – http://squatchcoffee.com/

Bob Gimlin – was he hoodwinked, or did it happen?  Not sure, but he is a gracious man to those that seek him out.

Gift Received – a time machine with 15 minutes on it in case he wants to go back and have a second chance to solve this enigma – in other words pull the trigger

Bobbie Short – RIP – for being a tireless chronicler of all things bigfoot.

Gift Received – time with the creator

Todd Disotell – for being open-minded, to some degree, pushing the boundaries of hairdom and providing some tips, reason and class on a show that was sorely lacking all of those elements.

Gift Received – some funky hair coloring gels

Naughty

Miss-Litigation – lifetime achievement award for being vindictive, not walking her talk and relying upon the churn for new admirers.

Gift Received – one of those MIB memory erasing flash pens to solve the problem of those who have been in  bigfootery long enough to see the whole sad saga.

Most all of Facebook Bigfootery –  for giving a voice and easy venue for the whackadoodles and their worshipful drones/enforcers/digital KGB

Gift Received – a new hobby that does not include a computer

The Carpet Baggers – for carpet bagging and having pockets that are deeper than their integrity and good sense.

Gift Received – A new marketing slogan – “Can’t attend another bigfoot conference because it is sold out, come to ours, lots of seats and elbow room.”

The Foot Doc – for reaching even higher levels of selling one’s bigfootery soul for dollars and exposure.

Gift Received – $500 k, invest it wisely and it should solve the burning desire to make bigfootery dollars.

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BFE’s Naughty and Nice List

In the spirit of the holidays – certainly not an exhaustive list:

Nice

Bigfootery’s Courtney Love – as we said before,  unfiltered opinions voiced under the influence is sexy in a train wreck sort of way.

The folks over at the Facebook coalition page, for culling the sewer that is Facebook bigfootery and providing us the best of the whackadoodles

Bob Gimlin – was he hoodwinked, or did it happen?  Not sure, but he is a gracious man to those that seek him out.

Bobbie Short – RIP – for being a tireless chronicler of all things bigfoot.

Todd Disotell – for being open-minded, to some degree, pushing the boundaries of hairdom and providing some tips, reason and class on a show that was sorely lacking all of those elements.

Naughty

Miss-Litigation – lifetime achievement award for being vindictive, not walking her talk and relying upon the churn for new admirers.

Most all of Facebook Bigfootery –  for giving a voice and easy venue for the whackadoodles and their worshipful drones/enforcers/digital KGB

The Carpet Baggers – for carpet bagging and having pockets that are deeper than their integrity and good sense.

The Foot Doc – for reaching even higher levels of selling one’s bigfootery soul for dollars and exposure.

The Frequent Quit but come back a few days/weeks/months later Dudes – pity me, beg me to come back, love me mommy.  If we cannot take your word as honor when you say, “I quit”, how can we respect anything else you have to say or do?

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An Idea and A Few Quotes

Before heading out to the PNW version of Palm Springs, a brief idea and a few quotes.

The Idea – Hosted the analysts again, it is nice to get repeat customers ask for you.  Boss takes notice.  During the second annual fire water and fire get together, we were discussing bigfootery, how one needs a scorecard to keep all the personalities straight and to try to keep up with the latest alliance, falling out or cultation.  Her suggestion was a relationship tree, something they use all the time.  It is a graphical approach to mapping people and the interrelationships.  We were keen on the idea until we started to reflect upon the Facebook explosion and how dynamic the relationships are.  You would literally need software and have to spend time on it nearly every day to fully map the relationships.  We also realized that as we found the hubs, many would be quite pleased they yield such influence and power.  Perhaps in the future, but that is doubtful as the following quotes sum up our opinion of bigfootery at this moment.  Enough said, some will get it, some will get some of it, many will have it fly right past them, dat’s bigfootery.

“The Bigfootery Index (BI) is a function of Facebook groups and members cubed times the number of bigfoot shows on TV.  The BI has reached critical mass, there is no shutting that sucker down now. ”

BFE Founder and Chief Muck Stirrer

“That was the trouble with the supernatural, Vimbai thought–you didn’t know what laws ruled it, and what was a coincidence and what was a sign and what was weird and what wasn’t. It was like a whodunit, only the clues refused to be arranged into any sort of hierarchy or a straight narrative, and most of the time it wasn’t even clear if they indeed were clues; a jigsaw puzzle where all the pieces were blank.”
Ekaterina Sedia

“The great enemy of truth is very often not the lie–deliberate, contrived and dishonest–but the myth–persistent, persuasive and unrealistic. Too often we hold fast to the clichés of our forebears. We subject all facts to a prefabricated set of interpretations. We enjoy the comfort of opinion without the discomfort of thought.”

John F. Kennedy

“Battle not with monsters, lest ye become a monster, and if you gaze into the abyss, the abyss gazes also at you.”

Nietzsche

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Learned Something Interesting About Doc Meldrum – aka Footdoc Over The Weekend

It seems he was a card carrying member of Roger Patterson’s bigfoot club and recipient of his newsletter as a youngster.  So, his interest in sasquatch was indoctrinated at a young age and not as an adult and academic that happened upon the topic and bravely sailed into the trying academic waters of science mainstreamer’s view as being on the fringe.  This erodes our already dimming view of the foot doc, can someone say confirmation bias?  We previously posted a “scholarly” article where he attempted to use a bit of science and flawed logic to validate one of his religiously based beliefs, so perhaps we are getting more of the same with the bigfoot stuff.  He is certainly trying to turn a few bucks from it, which we are mostly ok with.

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Reading and Math is Fun-Duh-Mental

Myron had the following word problem in math:

You call a hotel to make a reservation for nine rooms, they say they have two different types of rooms each with nine openings.  The hotel also says they have other types of rooms, but not enough of those types to meet your reservation.  At a minimum how many rooms does the hotel have available?

Myron answers nine and does not pass the sixth grade proficiency test, but he does pass the Huckster test.

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Blurred Lines

Blurring lines is big in bigfootery.  The hucksters have to swerve and spin often.

When you sue someone with, in our opinion, greed, unclean hands ( a legal term that  fit) and a mean spirit in your heart, and then utterly lose, you gotta blur some lines to salvage the situation.

When things are slow for the conference you promote you gotta blur the lines.   You tell the masses the lodging is almost sold out and you will end ticket sales in a week.  Fact is a search of the lodge shows two types of rooms with at least nine available (the highest number you can reserve at one time so there may be more) and weeks later you can still buy the wonka deal.  Blur the lines, certainly don’t mention there is a huge gospel event in the area driving lodging activity.   Huckstering at its’ best.

But those examples are beside the point of this post, we are contemplating if Mountain Monsters blurs the lines.  There are a number of “reality shows” that are blurring lines to various degrees, Amish Mafia comes to mind.  We just wonder what the deal is with Mountain Monsters.  They always have fresh intel, better than average “evidence” from witnesses and generally a bunch of action each week.  In a hit and miss bigfootery world, these guys hit home runs every week.  The Yahoo show was especially action packed in terms of tracks and the calls.  Same thing for the show before that one.  That gets us to thinking about if they are blurring lines.  Another hot topic has been if our Appalachian brothers are like the Amish, they stay clean-shaven until married and then grow a dope ass beard.  Enquiring minds, and all that.

We are also enjoying via the DVR Survivor man.  Les is eloquently framing the  thought process of someone facing the possibility that Sasquatch exists with great rationality.  The videography has also been really good in our opinion.  Standing, well we have run into his type, not that unusual in bigfootery.  The blurring line point, as a call back, is that some of the “bigfoot researchers” we have taken exception to in the past are very Standing like, although they don’t know it and would never admit it.

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